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Big ups to Josh Howey and Danielle Worden!

Josh finished 4th in the state for wraastling and Danielle finished 3rd in the state for powerlifting

Entries in dave chappelle (4)

Athlete of the Week: Dylan Colussi

Murley was campaining all week about getting this award, and Ashley Fry had a great start to the week, but the Athlete of the Week for the 4th week of Summer 2018 is Dylan Colussi.

Q: Who had the 5 best workouts this week?

A: Dylan, Dylan, Dylan, Dylan, Dylan.

With the rookie crew it's tough to gauge workouts based on times or rounds because most of them either 1) forget to count rounds/keep track of time or 2) are doing the workout for quality. This week they were challenged with the heat on multiple workouts, and Dylan's running and cleans is what stood out. He moved from 5 to 10-lb. dumbbells as the week progressed (starting with 5s on Monday's Hotshots and finishing with 10s on yesterday's Jurassic Workout) and is showing good Pose technique on runs up to 400 meters. On Tuesday, while the morning session did a modified squat test, Dylan worked on his back squat for the first time and ended up looking pretty good with the Then for good measure he did the 2-min dumbbell squat test after his lifts were done and beat his rival, Dakarai, by 40 reps.

Our rookie crew is slowly developing this Summer - similar to last year - and Dylan is one of the most consistent ones. This week was a great example of that. Keep it going youngster!

Quote of the Week vol. 237

"I'll get asked, 'What happens if you go out there, tell your jokes, and no one laughs?'... Nothing happens! You get paid the same. You're not gonna die."

- Dave Chappelle


Bathroom Under Construction

Hey kids, the bathrooms were both acting funny foday in the form of seemingly low pressure/suction when flushing. This happened before when they were working on the roof and was fixed, but it came back. So I had a plumber come out and take a look at them and it might need a bit more work than the old fashioned plunge-a-thon.

As of now, we have one toilet that is currently connected to the ground (Harbaugh bathroom) and flushes very slowly. It can handle R. Kelly but no Randy Marsh efforts. I cannot make it more clear than that. The McDonalds down the street will surely take deposits of all shape, kind, and texture.

Both of our bathrooms are clean still and available for changing though.

Not okay in our bathroom at the moment

Hater's gonna hate

Athlete of the Winter '14-'15

He came the same suite that he was buried in. Similar to the one he does Farmers carryin'.

Jacob Augustine is a weird cat, but I'm glad he's on our side. After two straight years of one months on, eleven months off of CrossFit, the original Handsome Gentleman perused into the gym on the College Kids reunion. Since then, he has missed a grand total of two days. He has seen a dramatic improvement in form and strength (our meaning of strength) and even posted a 16 minute filthy fifty. But more than that, Jacob's presence has made an incredible impact on our Community - the weak link from Summer 2014. He is a college kid. And a male. And him being here helped Morrow, Faust, and Matt have someone to relate to. Also, statistics don't lie. Here is the website traffic since Jacob's arrival

Jacob's first day back was December 15 and his first website editorial was January 26

These past few months have easily been Jacob's best season of training. But unfortunately for him, he was not even the best Jacob in the Champions Club this winter.


Jacob Zelenak has literally transformed in front of our eyes. His dedication to getting better at baseball has been bordering on obsession and his attendance and training reflects it. Let me just throw a couple numbers out there for you:

Lifts 4 Gifts - 745-lb. total

1 rep max clean - 225 lbs.

Filthy fifty - 14:20 as rx'd

Max box jump - 20 in. (from a kneeling position)

Something is not right there. It's been since Katie Bromm's Athlete of the Fall performance where I have seen someone undergo this extreme transformation. Just to give you an idea, his 3 rep max deadlift was 280 with a ^ on December 1. His 3 rep max deadlift three days ago was 315 with solid form. On top of all that, he's starting to coach with us. You have to remind yourself sometimes that this kid is still only 16 years old.

But still, not even JZ was good enough for Athlete of the Fall this time around.


This is the 5th year the Champions Club has been in operation during the winter. We have seen probably close to 500 different athletes come through our doors (wherever those doors may have been located). As a coach, I have always looked to recruit the best athletes to train with us. It's partially an ego thing and partially because I think our stuff is as close to magic as it gets for athletic development. But then I noticed that most of the really good athletes I have come across don't have much of a desire to sign up for a place that tells them everything they are doing wrong. So I stopped trying and now just concentrate on the people who show up. And in the five years of the Champions Club, there is one person who has showed up more than anyone else in the history of our program. More than Ryan, more than Emma, more than Murley. And it turns out that the winter of '14-'15 was the best season of this athlete's time with the Champions Club. In my opinion, it was also better than anyone else's.

The Athlete of the Winter is Mrs. Carey.

It really started with a conversation Murley and I had about two months ago. We were taking care of some website stuff after a session and she noticed I was not really doing anything - just kinda staring in a daze. She asked me what's up and I replied by asking her who she thought moved the best in our gym. She answered with the obvious: one of the Banets or JZ or the Kavanaughs.

But as I was thinking about it, I could not bring myself to say that anyone in the Champions Club impressed me more with how they moved than the first goddess of squats herself: Mrs. Carey. She turned 50 years old at the end of last month, and has the best squat form out of anyone, can deadlift 225-lbs. three times, climbs ropes with no problem, runs, jumps, and has a work capacity that can help her keep up with kids 30 years younger. Granted, she couldn't do a push-up if her life-alert depended on it, but we'll overlook that for now.

More than any of that, Mrs. Carey never acts her age. And that is something I sincerely hope I can say for myself when I am 50. She tells underwear jokes, gossips with Mrs. Pip, plays in the snow, talks to the Banets and Rachael Kroll like they are her siblings, compares her body with Shannon... all in the middle of a freakin workout! Then after she kicks everyone's butt, she serves us pancakes.


In the world of being a parent (one that neither myself or many of you will understand for a long time), this young lady has made no excuses for herself. She shows up 5-6 days per week with her water bottle stratigically placed right under the pull-up bar ready to throw down. Taking into account she has to look after three boys (four if you include Mr. Carey) makes her fitness level even more impressive. Sure it takes her a few rounds of the warmup to "get into it" but she's still here nevertheless. Best of all, she will talk with anyone about anything if they are willing to listen (and sometimes even when they are not).

Year-for-year, Mrs. Carey might be our best athlete. At the very least, our best this winter.

Leader in the war combating adulthood