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jz, ricky, secret sauce in Quote of the Week
jz, ricky, secret sauce in Quote of the Week Quote of the Week vol. 54: Secret Sauce Edition
by, Chris Sinagoga | Wednesday, September 17, 2014 at 1:00PM
Chris Sinagoga | Wednesday, September 17, 2014 at 1:00PM "JZ, you are a scrawny boy"
- Ricky Carey yesterday after JZ mentioned his coaches telling him he needs to gain weight.
Apparently JZ took this to heart because he recently started taking a supplement. This one is called Secret Sauce (no foolies). It's scientifically designed to make your nipples look like water balloon, genetically modified with pig intestines (well, not actual pig intestines, but a genetically modified extract of pig intestines), and blatant copyright infringement on the Greatest Movie of All Time. But, results are results. And after only a few days, JZ's transformation has been so extreme that the Secret Sauce's executive board of goons decided to sign him to an endorsement deal to promote the product.
A physique like this will no-doubt make him better at hitting a baseball this year. But in the meantime, we are accepting any and all donations in the forms of weights, tires, semitrucks , or anything else that could pass as a deadlifting apparatus for the newly-enhanced Jacob Zelenak.
Reader Comments (4)
I shit you not I just died in the middle of class and everyone looked at me like I was stupid hahaha
You would've laughed more at Mr. Wonsil's quote from yesterday but I didn't think it was quite suitable enough to post - even by our standards
Hahah get big JZ!
Drink milk!